Life Blog – Shielded

Ever since I told my mother about being diagnosed, I’ve felt worse. I hadn’t told her the complete truth about the diagnosis, as I didn’t want her to worry too much about it, but even so, I’m starting to regret having told her anything.

These days I hate talking to my mother, I try to put it off for days. Why? Because I feel like I’m bein wrapped in layers of bubble wrap by her. Every time she calls, she will tell me about some sort of action I need to take regarding my health getting better (apparently). This happens without fail. Today she said, “You need to start taking Omega 3 tablets. It will help you. Make sure you take them!” She then followed up by asking if I’d been doing everything els she had told me to do.

I don’t want to be wrapped up and shielded because I don’t need to be. This sort of action only makes me feel worse, only makes my suffocation worse, but they don’t seem to understand. It makes me resent going home or talking to them because the last thing I need is to be focusing on the issue at hand. I do so much better when I don’t focus on it.

I wish I could just disappear and shut myself off from everything and everyone because it’s starting to become really difficult again. I just want to be left alone.

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