I have my first exam of my final year at university in just over 6 hours. 6 hours. Meaning I need to be up in about 4 hours to make sure I have enough time to patiently and calmly get through my morning routine.
Why am I still awake? Trust me when I say I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve asked myself that same question.
It’s not fear, nor any nervousness or panic towards the exam. Quite the contrary actually. It’s acting as yet another trigger and bringing back thoughts I really want to put away. The trigger is of last exam season – end of my last academic year, so around May 2016 – and of how things were at that time.
It’s silly, to be thinking about those memories right now. Especially hours before I need to be up to sit one of 5 exams that may make or break my degree. I’m not sure whether I feel longing.. or regret. But whatever it is, it’s certainly doing a good job at keeping me awake.
On a side note, I knew the photo I have used as the featured image for this post would come in handy one day! It was taken just under 4 years ago at the hotel we were staying at in Barcelona, after a very, very long coach journey.